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Cougar-town

Andy: Ellie's just jealous because she thinks I care more about you than her.
Bobby: Do you?
Andy: Yes, it's not even close.

When you get up from that ottoman I'd go get a pregnancy test.

Jules

Andy: He's your son.
Ellie: He needs to learn.

Travis: Well you're betraying your own life philosophy.
Laurie: Never fight shorthaired bitches?

Park Ranger: You married to one of those guys?
Ellie: No, they're lovers.

Jules: Way to go new guy.
Grayson: New guy? I am a key member of this group. I provide the sizzle.

Jules: Still, Ellie thinks she's horrible, and we all agree with her.
Grayson: Oh.

[Title Card]: Pay attention. The title: Cougar Town almost makes sense this week.

Dead mom high five!

Jules

How could you not believe me about my mom? You're my best friend, all I ask is that you have blind faith in me, and that you hit me with a shovel if I ever got a toe ring.

Ellie

Since you recently found out you're a dad, I baked you a congrats on your baby-that-you-had-with-a-drunk-that-picked-up-at-your-bar-before-you-started-dating-Jules cake!

Laurie

Jules: What are you guys doing here anyway?
Travis: We're stealing-
Jules: -I'm in! I love it when we do things as a family!

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 94 in total

Cougar Town Season 3 Quotes

Jules: All I want to do is make you happy.
Grayson: Really? Maybe tonight we'll..
Jules: ... it's not about sex, babe. But I want you to try to keep listening.
Grayson: I'll try my best.

[Title Card]: Yeah, it's still called Cougar Town we're not happy about it either.

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