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I've seen better faces on a hemorrhoid.

Joan Rivers

See the little green light? Just gotta turn it on. Or you can fire the black man. Whatever works for you.

Wanda

Larry: You gotta get a shot of Benadryl while she's sleeping, or shove it down her throat.
Richard Lewis: Like a hitman? A Benedryl hitman?

Larry's a tip profiler... He fixed a black man's tip.

Wanda

Yeah, know what would match her head? A dress made of turnips and blood.

Richard Lewis

Why not just pray for the TV? Why even have someone come in and fix the television?

Larry

Larry: Scrabble?
Jeff: I'd love to play Scrabble!
Larry: I said it and kind of got in the mood.

Larry: Here, I'll tell you a secret: I might be losing a testicle.

Larry: You gotta get a shot and stick it in her ass.
Richard: She's not a racehorse.

(About joining the prayer circle) What? You gotta be kidding? No, believe me, you don't want me in this thing. She'll wind up with tuberculosis. I have bad karma.

Larry

Well, maybe we should play Scrabble.

Larry
Displaying all 11 quotes

Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 3 Episode 2 Quotes

See the little green light? Just gotta turn it on. Or you can fire the black man. Whatever works for you.

Wanda

I've seen better faces on a hemorrhoid.

Joan Rivers