Desperate Housewives

Desperate Housewives

Sundays 9:00 PM on ABC

Latest Review

Season: 8 7 6 3 2 1

Desperate Housewives Quotes (Page 5)

Season 8 Episode 3: "Watch While I Revise the World"

Lee: I could be a girl. I could totally be a girl.
Renee: Well, you got the voice down.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Lynette: You can't marry that sunflower seed.
 • Rating: Unrated
Renee: I hate to see people crying. It reminds me how little I actually care about others.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Gaby: I can pick locks. Adultery gave me some valuable life skills.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 2: "Making the Connection"

Ben: Life is brutally simple. Life is getting what you want and protecting who you love. And everything else is weakness.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Bree: Is this actually happening? Gaby Solis is asking us for sex tips?
Gaby: I know. It's the apocalypse.
 • Rating: Unrated
Renee: Old people are adorable. I love their little raisin faces and those tennis balls they put on their walkers.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Mrs. McCluskey: What am I, a cat? I'm allowed to be out past ten.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 1: "Secrets That I Never Want to Know"

Gaby: Since we caught Bin Laden, we can stroll on the plane anytime we want.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Robber: Get out!
Bree: What?!
Robber: I'm taking your car.
Bree: Oh my God, I could kiss you.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Gaby: I'm worried about you. First, you stop talking to your friends. Now, you're wiggin' out at a rat funeral. You're making me nervous.
Susan: Well, I'm sorry I'm not handling accessory to murder as well as the rest of you.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Priest: Nuts, I was really hoping this would be a good one.
Gaby: I made out with two chicks once in college.
Priest: This job rocks.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Renee: What's your guess? Wonky eye? Rabbit teeth? Comb over? One normal eyebrow? One really big one? Baby hands? I had it all in one guy... did not end well.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Chuck: Don't take this the wrong way, but you could do this professionally.
Bree: Coming from a man who's on a first name basis with half the hookers in Fairview, that's quite a compliment to take, Detective.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Susan: We're not criminals. We drive carpool.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

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Season: 8 7 6 3 2 1
Total Season 8 Quotes: 95
Total Desperate Housewives Quotes: 1302
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