It was lovely having sex with you. Have a wonderful day.

Bree

If it's a three-way, that's how I met my ex-husband.

Renee

Good friends are the ones who tell us the truth about ourselves... even when the truth might be something we're reluctant to admit - that we still have a great deal to learn, that we sometimes need to ask for help, that we maybe overlooking a golden opportunity. Yes, hearing the truth can often set us on a different path, but we never know where that path might take us or who might be watching.

Mary Alice

Have you ever taken the bus at 1 o'clock in the morning, Renee? It makes you stop believing in God.

Bree

The Bronte sisters? Geez, even your boob jokes are repressed.
 

Renee

Bree: I don't like your accusatory tone.
Gaby: Well, I'd use a different tone, but I'm trying to accuse you of something.

It's a cop funeral. What do you expect... clowns?

Gaby

You think I killed someone? It's not like potato chips.

Carlos

I'd rather see you in a straightjacket than in a coffin.

Renee

Mary Alice: Keeping secrets is a lonely business. That's why we all search for someone to confide in: an ally who will understand, an advisor who we can trust, a friend who will never judge.

There comes a time when we must expose our weaknesses. When our secrets can no longer remain private, when our solitude can no longer be denied, when our pain can no longer be ignored, but sometimes we feel so alone that a weaknesses we thought we'd overcome suddenly becomes too long to fight.

Mary Alice

It's like a book. Meet Dick and Jane. See Jane kill Dick. See Jane bury Dick. Run, Jane. Run, Jane.

Gaby

Desperate Housewives Quotes

I love you once. I love you twice. I love you more than beans and rice.

Mike

(narrating) The world is filled with good fathers. How do we recongnize them? They are the ones who are missed so terribly, everything falls apart in their absence. (Shot of Andrew and Bree packing his suitcase, placing a photo of Rex inside last.) They are the ones who love us, long before we even arrive. (Shot of Carlos smiling as he rubs Gabrielle's stomach.) They are the ones who come looking for us, when we can't find our way home. (Shot of Mike walking Bongo as he looks at a flyer of Zach's) Yes, the world is filled with good fathers. And the best are the ones who make the women in their lives feel like good mothers (Shot of Tom comforting Lynette as she cries)

Mary Alice