Frank: Hey... I'm Frank, Libby's boyfriend.
Gabielle: Libby, you didn't tell us you had a boyfriend!
Libby: Didn't I?! I thought I had...
Frank: What's that? A present for our baby?
Carlos: I'm sorry... Did you just say "our baby?"

...The easiest way to overcome one addiction is to replace it with another one.

Mary Alice

Libby: Oh come on Frank, you know you'll be a lousy father!
Frank: It's my kid! And I have the right to mess her up If I want to!

Carlos: He's not going to sell his baby for $8000!
Gabrielle: Are we talking about the same idiot?! I think for $30,000 you throw in a kidney!

Gabrielle: So you think Bree punched Andrew in the face 'cause I don't!
Lynette: I don't either, but on the other hand, she spanked my kids, she lied about her drinking, and I once saw her bitchslap her mother-in-law. So I'm torn.
Gabrielle: Well I'm siding with Bree.

If you'll excuse me, I gotta go buy a wedding dress! Oh by the way, I'll be wearing white so that'll be a surprise for everybody!


Edie: Don't tell anyone but I'm planning a huge surprise for Karl!
Susan: Surprise?!
Edie: Yeah I put in together an engagement party tomorrow afternoon.
Julie: Oh Cool!
Edie: But that's not the surprise. Actually, it's gonna be a surprise wedding!

Donna: Now come on!
Bree: Come on?! Where are we going?!
Donna: Hiking! There is nothing like it to take your mind off booze!

Mr. Beale: You paid Libby?
Gabrielle: You said we could give her gifts. Everybody loves getting cash.

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