Desperate Housewives Season 2 Quotes
Gabrielle: Honey, look. I bought us matching golf outfits for our lessons tomorrow.
Carlos: Yeah, about that-I can't go. I gotta pick up trash on the freeway.
Gabrielle: I'm sorry?
Carlos: I have to do my community service. It's part of my parole, remember?
Gabrielle: Oh, okay, well, I'll just call the country club and cancel our lessons.
Carlos: No, no, no. I am...I paid already. Might as well go without me.
Gabrielle: I don't wanna go alone. It was your idea in the first place.
Carlos: And I'd love to be there with you, too, if I didn't have to scrape slushies and condoms off Route 57. Look, what's the big deal? Just go take the stupid lesson.
Gabrielle: Fine, if you feel that way about it. Hey, I'm sorry. I'm just a little on edge today.
- Permalink: Honey, look. I bought us matching golf outfits for our lessons t...
You're not going to walk me into a wall, are you?Julie
- Permalink: You're not going to walk me into a wall, are you?
Bree, hi. It's Betty. I'm sorry to leave this on the machine, but the police have evidence that implicates Matthew in the murder of Melanie Foster. We have to find them, Bree. We have to find them and get Danielle back.Betty
- Permalink: Bree, hi. It's Betty. I'm sorry to leave this on the machine, bu...
Susan: What's the catch?
Karl: There's no catch. It's yours, Susie. Yours and Julie's. No strings attached.
Susan: I can't accept this. I just I gotta get out of this mess on my own.
Karl: This is not charity. I owe you... for everything I've done over the years, for all the heartache I've inflicted on you. Consider it payback.
Julie: Mom! There's a pool and a jacuzzi!
Karl: At least no one can drive off with it while you're sleeping, huh?
- Permalink: What's the catch? There's no catch. It's yours, Susie. Yours a...
Gabrielle: Well, Carlos, they had your name.
Carlos: Oh, no. poor Ralph.
Gabrielle: Oh! Why is your back all sweaty?
Carlos: I was working out on the treadmill.
- Permalink: Well, Carlos, they had your name. Oh, no. poor Ralph. Oh! W...
Carlos: Hey, what are you doing?
Gabrielle: Trying to have sex with you.
Carlos: Now? Babe, it's kind of late.
Gabrielle: You don't wanna have sex with me? You always wanna have sex with me. You wanted to have sex with me an hour after your hernia operation.
Carlos: I'm a little preoccupied. A good man died today. Don't take it personally.
- Permalink: Hey, what are you doing? Trying to have sex with you. Now? B...
Bree: You let go of me right now!
Dr. Barr: Hey, hey! What's going on here?
Bree: I am trying to leave, and these morons won't let me. Do you know that you can be arrested for kidnapping and for detaining someone?!
Dr. Barr: Why do you need to leave?
Bree: Because my daughter is in danger.
Dr. Barr: Something happened at cheerleading camp?
Bree: Okay, there's no camp. That was a fib on my part. I found out that she ran away with a boy and the boy is a murderer.
- Permalink: You let go of me right now! Hey, hey! What's going on here? ...
We met Gabrielle Solis the day she moved to Wisteria Lane. We were all excited to get a glimpse of a successful New York model.Mary Alice
- Permalink: We met Gabrielle Solis the day she moved to Wisteria Lane. We we...
Carlos: Hey, babe. Why you home so early?
Gabrielle: Oh, honey! Oh, you're not dead!
Carlos: Who said I was dead?
Garielle: The police. They called me.
Carlos: What are you talking about?
Gabrielle: Honey, they didn't know all the details, but a witness said that they saw you run into the carpool lane to pick up a lawn chair that had fallen off some truck, and then a bus hit you right in front of the road crew. Why aren't you at the road crew?
- Permalink: Hey, babe. Why you home so early? Oh, honey! Oh, you're not de...
Zach: Well, you said all of this was gonna be mine, so when do I get it?!
Noah: Empire is a highfalutin word, but that's what I've built. Unfortunately, an empire can only be ruled by an iron fist and a strong gut. I wanted to give it to you, Zach,
but I'm starting to have my doubts about you.
Zach: So what? Are you cutting me off?
Noah: I don't have any use for weakness. Get out.
Noah: What, are you gonna kill me? Prove you're a tough guy? See? That's why I can't give you the keys to the kingdom, Kid. No balls.
- Permalink: Well, you said all of this was gonna be mine, so when do I get i...
Mary Alice: Hi, uh, we just wanted to come welcome you to the neighborhood.
Bree: Um, but we could come back later.
Lynette: Yeah. No, wait. Actually, wait. This is perfect. You know why? Because we need some impartial judges.
Lynette: Let's suppose your husband begged you to get pregnant-- begged you--and out of the goodness of your heart, you agreed, even though it might derail your career.
You agreed to a baby. A baby, singular.
Tom: Lynette, we've just met these people.
- Permalink: Hi. Hi. Hi, uh, we just wanted to come welcome you to the ne...
I met Susan Mayer the day she moved to Wisteria Lane. She seemed so delightfully confident, I couldn't help but feel intimidated. That feeling... (shot of Susan falling down into the truck and locking herself up)... quickly passed.Mary-Alice
- Permalink: I met Susan Mayer the day she moved to Wisteria Lane. She seemed...
This cake is a symbol of my love!Bree
- Permalink: This cake is a symbol of my love!
Susan: Edie, what are you doing?
Edie: You are a lying liar.
Susan: We're in the middle of the street. Would you get out of here?
Edie: Karl never said that!
Susan: Okay, Karl asked me to get back together the day after Julie's birthday. I said no, which I'm guessing is the reason for the now legendary tequila bra-popping incident. Please let go.
Edie: Oh, no. We're not finished here.
Susan: Well, yes, we are. I'm gonna go.
- Permalink: Edie, what are you doing? You are a lying liar. We're in t...