I am not leaving that woman in charge of our children. In three months the twins will be chain-smoking and Penny will be an alcoholic.

Lynette

Parker: These are baby toys. We're too old to play with these.
Stella: Well, I'm too old to remember what the hell six-year-olds like to play with!

(narrating) Family. There is nothing more important. They're the ones who show up when we are in trouble. The ones who push us to succeed. The ones who help keep our secrets. But what of those who have no family to rely on? What happens to those poor souls who have no loved ones to help them in their hour of need? Well, most learn to walk life's road by themselves. But a sad few of us, simply stop trying.

Mary Alice

(Gabrielle asks Carlos to come to her wedding).
Carlos: I can't go.
Gabrielle: Why not?
Carlos: I'm a jinx. I wen't to your last wedding and look how that turned out. (Gabrielle gives him a look.) C'mon Gaby, we both know it'd be weird if I went.
Gabrielle: Okay, maybe a little, but it'll be weirder if you don't.
Carlos: Excuse me?
Gabrielle: Look, everyone knows you're living with Edie, if she shows up alone people will think I asked her not to bring you like it bugs me that you guys are together.
Carlos: But it does bug you, you hit the roof when you found out.
Gabrielle: (now yelling at him) Which is why I have to show people that I'm Okay with it! (calms herself) Please, just, consider it my wedding gift.
Carlos: Okay.. But I'm skipping the ceremony.
Gabrielle: What? And just go to the reception? You can't do that.
Carlos: Well I don't wanna make a scene. You'll vow "Til death do us part" I'll bust out laughing, people will stare...
Gabrielle: Reception starts at four.

(Carlos looks for money to give the paperboy and discovers Edie's pills.)
Danny: What's that?
Carlos: It's birth control pills.
Danny: I'm gonna need cash.

Remember when I was giving birth to the twins and screaming in agony because Porter was dragging my uterus out with him? Well I was more in the mood for sex then than I am now!

. Lynette

From the moment we wake up in the morning 'til our head hits the pillow at night, our lives are filled with questions. Most are easily answered and soon forgotten. But some questions are much harder to ask because we are so afraid of the answer. Will I be around to watch my children grow up? Am I making a mistake by marrying this man? Could he ever truly love me? And what happens when we ask ourself the hard question and get the answer we've been hoping for? Well, that's when happiness begins.

Mary Alice

Edie: (to Susan, about Gabrielle) At least get her a thoughtless crappy gift, like a blender.
Susan: I got you a blender for Christmas.
Edie: And I use it everyday... Gotta go! (Edie leaves)

Mary Alice (narrating): Exactly one year had passed since the night Mike Delfino and Susan Mayer were supposed to become engaged. So when Mike took Susan to her favorite restaurant, she just knew he was going to pop the question.
Mike (to Susan): What're you gonna have?
Mary Alice: And when he did
Susan: The chicken
Mary Alice: she'd be ready with her answer. But as the evening wore on, the moment Susan had been waiting for (Mike gets down on one knee, but only to tie his shoe)failed to materialize. (Later, a man standing next to their table playing the violin) And though many opportunities presented themselves (Mike puts his hand inside his jacket as if he wanna take something out. Susan drops what's in her hand to get ready, but Mike only takes out some cash to give them to the guy)the question was never asked. (Later, a plate with a cover is put on the table and Susan thought this is it) Until the thought began to dawn on Susan that perhaps (Mike removes the cover and reveals a seemingly special sweet dish)it never would (Susan looks very disappointed).

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