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When you surprise yourself, I saw celebrate the moment, don't punish yourself for it.

Owen [to Kim]

If you hadn't have screwed up, I could've had Beyonce's career!

Teri [to Ian]

The only sound I hear is my stomach turning from eating a cheesesteak. I swear, one of the twins is a judgmental vegan.


This doesn't have to make sense to you. This is my life. And I'm gonna live it the way I want.


Jane: It's like I don't even know you.
Owen: I could say the same thing about you right now.

Kim: You act like we're walking into an episode of "Game of Thrones".
Owen: Yes, with less nudity and more paperwork.

When I feel down, I have to remind myself that I'm getting a second chance with this woman. The only woman I've ever loved.


It wasn't just a peck on the cheek, they were going at it like a soldier returning home to his a porno.


I'm exhausted jumping through hoops trying to make my life look normal to the outside world. I'm done.

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