Sundays 10:30 PM on HBO
Eastbound-and-down

From this moment on, you're no longer little kids. You're cold, calculated murderers. This is the mindset you gotta be in if you wanna be a champion.

Kenny Powers

Smashing a brick through a f*cking dude's window is nothing compared to the things I've done. I've killed people.

Kenny Powers

Some people say that Kenny Powers is a woman hater. That's not true - I love women. Every f*cking one of them, even the ugly as sh*t ones. But don't ask me to trust them. Not even nuns. Because every pair of t*ts comes with a gaping hole of need that even Kenny Powers can't fill.

Kenny Powers

I have been blessed with many things in this life - an arm like a damn rocket, a c*ck like a burmese python, and the mind of a f*cking scientist.

Kenny Powers

Kenny: I need you to score me some juice.
Clegg: What do you mean? Like from the store.
Kenny: No, you idiot. Steroids!

If there's one thing I hate it's losing. If there's two things I hate it's losing and getting cancer.

Kenny

Kenny: What are you looking at?
Paper Boy: Your hair asshole.
Kenny: Yeah, nice job making three bucks a week dipshit. Sell weed and you'll make more money.

So, besides getting shot in the back of the head do you know what else Abraham Lincoln did? He was a champion wrestler in high school and no, I'm not making that up.

Kenny
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Eastbound & Down Season 1 Episode 3 Quotes

So, besides getting shot in the back of the head do you know what else Abraham Lincoln did? He was a champion wrestler in high school and no, I'm not making that up.

Kenny

Kenny: I need you to score me some juice.
Clegg: What do you mean? Like from the store.
Kenny: No, you idiot. Steroids!

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