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[To Joan] I'm curious to know which one of us is right about my brother. I have my money on me.


Sherlock is addicted to being himself.


Sherlock: Watson, this is Fatty.
Mycroft: Fatty? Not anymore.
Sherlock: Lap band?
Mycroft: Exercise?
Sherlock: Exercise requires energy and ambition, and you've never had either.

What do you expect from a guy named Geezer Bob?


Hopkins: You look exactly the same!
Sherlock: As do you. Except that you've gained a stone and quarter, and your hairline is receding.
Hopkins: You're slipping, I've gained exactly a stone and a half.
Sherlock: I'm not slipping, I've just grown more courteous.

[To Joan] Without you the airline might seat me next to a morbidly obese person, or child, or morbidly obese child.


I see you've been tending to your self defense.

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