Jack: What's the deal with your uncle?
Kevin: He's just sort of prejudice.
Jack: Against WHITE people?
Kevin: No, against dumb people - no offense.

Henry: May I present Doctor and Mister Jack Carter!
Allison: Jack, we're married
Jack: How's it feel?
Allison: Wet.

Allison: What are we doing?
Jack: Is that a trick question, I'm not that bright.

Allison: What do you think I go around comparing your IQ to my previous husbands?
Jack: I do now.

Jack: Ok, I was expecting something worse.
Allison: It fried the power and communications
Jack: Now what?
Allison: We drift to the bottom of the lake.

Don't worry, you'll un-Beeker in a day or two.

Zane

Jack: Do you know how Fargo's been living on my couch and spending every second with his sort of dead girlfriend, it's not healthy. So I'm wondering in your lovable and tactful way maybe......
Andy: Kick'em to the curb?
Jack: Glad we understand each other.

Allison: Fargo when was the last time you ate, or bathed, or weren't here?
Fargo: My beloved can't leave so I'm not leaving. Don't worry I have plenty of sick days.

You need anything? Beer? A Hug?

Zane
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