Family Guy

Family Guy "Death Has a Shadow" Quotes

Lois: Peter, what did you promise me last night?
Peter: I wouldn't drink at the stag party.
Lois: And what did you do?
Peter: Drank at the stag pa-woah, I almost walked right into that one
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: I told Lois I wouldn't drink.
Quagmire: Don't feel so bad Peter.
Peter: Hey, I never thought of it that way
 • Rating: Unrated

Peter: When she worries she says things like "I told you so" and "stop doing that, I'm asleep."
 • Rating: Unrated

Brian [in prison]: Uh, how was your shower?
Peter: Oh, I tell ya Brian, all the rumors about dropping the soap are true.
Brian: Really?
Peter: Oh yeah, you can't hold onto that thing to save your life. Oh, it was slipping all over the place. Guys were laughing
 • Rating: Unrated

Judge: Mr. Griffin, don't you think you should have alerted the government to such a gross over-payment?
Peter: Well uh, I was gonna call 'em but uh, my favorite episode of Diff'rent Strokes was on
 • Rating: Unrated

Lois: Stewie, why don't you play in the other room?
Stewie: Why don't you burn in hell!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter: Now kids, daddy only drank so the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off
 • Rating: Unrated

Stewie: Damn you, vile woman! You've impeded my work since the day I escaped from your wretched womb
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter [at communion]: Whoa! Is that really the blood of Christ?
Priest: Yes.
Peter: Man, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Voiceover on TV: The Statue Of Liberty was a gift from France...
Guy: The Statue Of Liberty!?
Peter: Oh my kid must of taped over this for history class. Boys, boys! We're going to drink till she's hot.
Quagmire: Hey, thats just crazy enough to work
 • Rating: Unrated

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