Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXFamily Guy Season 5 Episode 11: "The Tan Aquatic with Steve Zissou" Quotes
(Old guy staring at a midget)
Midget: Sir, would you please stop staring at me?
Old Guy: Where's the rest of ya?
Peter: I'll do it Lois. Right after a healthy breakfast of juice, toast, and store brand imitation frosted flakes featuring Terry the Tiger.
Terry the Tiger: They'reeeee... food!
What's going on in my pants? Looks like we got six more weeks of winter.
Herbert
Joe: Hey, do you think it's time to talk to Quagmire about his anger issues with this game?
Cleveland: A white man shouldn't play sports in the first place.
Peter: It's Cleveland I'm worried about.
Cleveland: (wearing a President Nixon mask) Peter, is this really necessary? I can't hardly see anything.
Golfers: Hey, look, it's President Nixon! (Cleveland takes off mask) No, wait, it's a black guy! (Cleveland puts mask back on) No, it's Nixon.
Boys, Boys. We can settle this like reasonable and sexy teenagers. Whoever can swallow the most Tylenol PM wins.
Herbert
(Brian is taking the trash out, and hears music)
Brian: Stewie, what are you doing?
Stewie: Just gettin' my bronze on baby. Hey, what do you think of my recumbent tan pose? Huh, legs probably spread a little wider than they ought to be, but who gives a damn. This is just tan Stewie being tan Stewie. Check me out Brian.
(Stewie grabs a Tab soda from a cooler and drinks it so the label is showing, then turns to the camera and smiles)
Peter: Hey Fulcher!
Fulcher: Griffin?
Peter: The feeling's mutual.
Fulcher: What are you doing here?
Peter: I'm here to kick your ass, Fulcher. I'm gonna beat ya, and then my son Chris is gonna beat ya. It's gonna be an old fashion father-son beat-off.
Chris: Wait a minute dad, you can't hit him.
Fulcher: Yeah, I have MS.
Peter: Oh, ya hear that Chris? This guy's got a monkey scrotum and he's braggin' about it. Now ya really got me mad.
