Family Guy
Sundays 9:00 PM on FOXFamily Guy Season 11 Quotes
God, it's good to be old and nude.
Carter
I want Hershey kiss nipples, and I want you to pay for them!
Peter
Pewterschimdt, you imbecile! You think that's funny, wasting fruit? There are people dying in hilarious places!
Barrington
Lois: (while Peter plays harmonica music) I accidentally backed over a kid in the grocery store parking lot. Peter, I'm serious. I ran right over the soft part of the face. I had to run away. I ditched the car and snuck on a passing train. I was so scared, I didn't get off until I was in the south. What'd you do today?
Peter: I pushed a boy behind your car so I could do all this harmonica stuff.
Oh my god. It was in the tub, and now it's in my butt!
Peter
How does it feel to be the least-cultured person at a bus station?
Stewie
Well, looks like Archibald Meatpants is gonna have a fun night.
Stewie
Look, it's not like we've got a lot to live for. I'm just going to end up like Chris, only I'll be smart enough to realize how miserable I am.
Stewie
Apollo: I was booked for three hours by "Archibald Meatpants."
Brian: He's...he's dead.
Apollo: Well, either way, I'm getting paid and somebody's getting torn open.
The porn is free but we have to watch it in the lobby.
Stewie
It says here there's a continental breakfast. Oh...the continent is Africa.
Stewie
Thank God we're finally here. Kind of weird that they showed Flight 93 on Flight 93.
Brian
