Flight of the Conchords Quotes
Murray: Bret, could you get a pencil out of my stationary cabinet, please?
Bret: Where's that?
Murray: Just the glove box.
Jemaine: Women love weaving, they love to weave.
Bret: No, weaving is a man's game.
Jemaine: Bret, you put a woman in front of weaving machine and just watch her go.
Bret: No, honestly, my Dad weaves, my grandfather was a weaver... I come from a family of weavers.
Jemaine: I've never seen a man weave.
Bret: I love weaving. I'm weaving at the moment, making a pair of tro
Landlord: I'm going to give you a month to pay me
Bret: Can we pick which month?
Landlord: No
Bret: She works down at the cheap zoo
Jermaine: The pet store?
Dave: You guys seem a lot cooler today. Usually you guys wear clothes from the 70's.
Jermaine: They're not from the 70's, they're from New Zealand.
Dave: Isn't that the same thing?
Jermaine: Similar I suppose.
Murray: Greg, I need some anti-glue.
Greg: What is anti-glue?
Murray: It's anti-glue, it gets rid of glue.
Greg: I don't think that exists Murray.
Murray: Well, just get it, okay?
Woman [to Dave at New Zealand Town information booth]: What language do you speak here?
Dave: Um, we pretty much make it up as we go along. That's why the people from there are so hard to understand
Bret: Todd's not cool.
Murray: What do you mean? He's cooler than both of you put together. Look at him over there with all his friends. He's like the Pied Piper of cool. Pied Piper was cool wasn't he?
Bret: Pied Piper wasn't cool, he took all those kids into a cave.
Murray: No, I mean before that phase; when it was just the rats.
Bret: Okay, I'm just going to say, "Dear Todd, thank you very much, but you can't be in the band anymore."
Jemaine: Umm. I don't think you should do it, man. You're too easily offended.
Bret: I can't believe you just said that.
Bands shouldn't have girlfriends. You lose your female fan base. What about Wham? You never saw Wham with girlfriends. That's how they kept the women wanting them. No girlfriends
Murray
I think you've gotta use honesty here. I mean, you know, it's always the best policy. Like the other day there was five, well, maybe there was like four really hot foreign chicks, either like Swedish or Korean, in my shop, and they were like "Dave, we wanna have a five way with you." I just told them, "honestly, okay." Then I gave it to 'em. Hard.
Dave
Jemaine: You don't even know anything about threesomes.
Bret: Have you ever had a threesome?
Jemaine: Nearly.
Bret: What do you mean, nearly?
Jemaine: I've had a twosome.
