Joey: Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any tater tots.
Monica: That's not a question.

Rachel: Terry, I, I, I know that I haven't worked here very long, but I was wondering, do you think it would be possible if I got a $100 advance in my salary?
Terry: An advance?
Rachel: It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.
Terry: Rachel, Rachel, sweetheart. You're a terrible, terrible waitress. Really, really awful.

Ross: Oh, I uh, just came by to pick up my skull. Well, not mine, but...
Susan: Come in.
Ross: Thanks. Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back to the museum.
Susan: What's it look like?
Ross: Kinda like a big face without skin.

Chandler: An 80-foot inflatable dog loose over the city? How often does that happen?
Phoebe: Almost never.

Chandler: The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has gotten away.
Joey: The balloon?
Chandler: (In a sarcastic tone) No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon.

Monica: And I assume Chandler, you're still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.
Chandler: Yes every single one of them.

Chandler: Alright I'd like to propose a toast, a little toast here. Ding, ding! I know this isn't exactly the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you planned, but for me, this has been really great. You know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway I was just thinking, I mean, if you had gone to Vail or if you guys had been with your family or if you didn't have syphilis and stuff ... we wouldn't be all together you know, so I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm very thankful that all your Thanksgivings sucked.
Everyone Else: That's so sweet!
Ross: And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas!
Rachel: And a crappy new year.
Chandler: Here, Here!

Monica: (Holding sandwich) Does anybody wanna split this with me?
Joey: Oh, I will.
Phoebe: Ooh, you guys have to make a wish.
Monica: Make a wish?
Phoebe: Come on, you know, Thanksgiving.
(They rip the sandwich in two halfs)
Phoebe: Ooh, you got the bigger half. What'd you wish for?
Joey: The bigger half.

(Singing to Carol's stomach) Hey, hey, I'm your daddy. I'm the one without any breasts.

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