Ross: (About Casey, Rachel's date) Do you have any idea what he wants to do with her?
Chandler: Well I'm guessing do a little dance. You know, make a little love. Well, pretty much just get down tonight.

Joey: You have any idea what this'll do for your sex life?
Chandler: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first, but once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.

Phoebe: Do you want a refill?
Chandler: No, I'm all right, thanks.
Phoebe: Okay. Ooh, okay, you have got to give me a second, I want to get this just right. (Sticking out her gut, clearing her throat, and sniffing her nose; then in her best male voice) Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checking you out. (Going back to her normal voice) That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.

(About Ross and Rachel kissing) He's her lobster!

Phoebe

Chandler: What's this?
Joey: Eight hundred and twelve bucks.
Chandler: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night.

Joey: Some girl ate Monica!
Monica: Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
Chandler: Ah, so how many cameras are actually on you?

Well, hello Mr. Kotter!

Joey

Friends Season 2 Episode 14 Quotes

Phoebe: (About Ross's chances to date Rachel) Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
Ross: Okay, now how do you know that?
Phoebe: Because she's your lobster.

Joey: If you hated the bracelet so much Chandler, you should have just said so.
Chandler: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?
Joey: What about the fact that you insulted the bracelet and you made fun of me?
Chandler: Okay, well, that's the part where I'm a wank.