Monica: So what's Phoebe like?
Phoebe: I'm kind, caring, and sweet. What's Monica like?
Monica: Ah no, the other Phoebe, the one you went to go see.
- Permalink: So what's Phoebe like? I'm kind, caring, and sweet. What's Mon...
Chandler: If worse comes to worse, I'll be your boyfriend.
Monica: (Laughing) Yeah right.
- Permalink: If worse comes to worse, I'll be your boyfriend. Yeah right.
Ross: You still love me?
Ross: You still love me.
Rachel: Oh yeah, so, you love me!
Ross: No, nnnnn. What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, get back together?
Rachel: No. Maybe. I don't know. Ross, I still can't forgive you for what you did, I can't, I just, but sometimes when I'm with you I just, I feel so...
Rachel: I just, I feel, I just...
Rachel: I feel...
- Permalink: You still love me? No. You still love me. Oh yeah, so, you...
Boss: And remember, there is no "I" in team.
Chandler: Yes, but there's two in "martini", so everybody back to my office!
- Permalink: And remember, there is no I in team. Yes, but there's two in m...
Rachel: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon? Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?
Phoebe: No, no, no, oh, keep your name, don't take his name.
Monica: He didn't ask me to marry him.
Phoebe: Well then definitely don't take his name.
- Permalink: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon? ...
Rachel: (On the subject of congratulatory butt-slapping) I don't understand guys. I'd never congratulate Monica on a great stew by grabbing her boob.
Chandler: Yeah, for a really great stew you just stick your head in between them.
Monica: Can we please go eat?
Ross: Yeah, what are we getting?
Monica: Anything but stew.
- Permalink: I don't understand guys. I'd never congratulate Monica on a grea...
Ross: (About Joey's finger in his mouth) What is that taste?
Joey: What? My hands are totally clean, I just gave the duck a bath.
- Permalink: What is that taste? What? My hands are totally clean, I just g...
Chandler: I don't want to be the guy who has a problem with his boss slapping his bottom.
Monica: I gotta tell ya, I think it's okay to be that guy.
- Permalink: I don't want to be the guy who has a problem with his boss slapp...
Rachel: (About Bonnie) You said she was bald!
Phoebe: Yes, she was, she's not now.
Rachel: How could you not tell me she has hair?
Phoebe: I don't know, I hardly say that about people!
- Permalink: You said she was bald! Yes, she was, she's not now. How coul...
Phoebe: Well, maybe it won't work out. Maybe Ross won't like her personality.
Rachel: Why, does she have a bad personality?
Phoebe: Oh no, Bonnie's the best!
- Permalink: Well, maybe it won't work out. Maybe Ross won't like her persona...
Monica: You're not gonna get going, are you?
Pete: Well, let me ask you a question. Am I the Ultimate Fighting Champion?
Monica: Well, no. But...
Pete: Well, I'm not gonna stop until I'm the Ultimate Fighting Champion.
Monica: That guy stood on your neck until you passed out!
Pete: Let me tell you a story. When I set out to create Moss 865, do you think it just happened overnight? No. There was Moss 1, that burnt down my Dad's garage, there was Moss 2 that would only schedule appointments in January, and 862 others that I learned from, just like I learned from this fight, never to let a guy stand on my neck.
Monica: You didn't know that already?
- Permalink: You're not gonna get going, are you? Well, let me ask you a qu...
(While watching Pete's fight on TV) Run! Run you crazy, rich freak.Chandler
- Permalink: Run! Run you crazy, rich freak.
Chandler: Joey's tailor... took advantage of me.
Joey: No way, I've been going to the guy for twelve years.
Chandler: Oh come on, he said he was going to do my inseem, then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite...
Ross: What? (Chandler closes his eyes)
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side then they move it back, and then they do the rear. Ross, will you tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
Ross: Yes, yes it is... in prison!
- Permalink: Joey's tailor... took advantage of me. What? No way, I've be...
- Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Monica: Hey, Joey! What would you do if you were omnipotent?
Joey: Probably kill myself.
Monica: Excuse me?
Joey: Hey, if Little Joey's dead, I got no reason to live.
Ross: Uh Joey... omnipotent.
Joey: You are? I'm so sorry. (To Chandler) I didn't know, I thought it was one of those theoretical questions.
- Permalink: Hey, Joey! What would you do if you were omnipotent? Probably...
- Rating: 4.2 / 5.0