Friends

Friends Quotes (Page 5)

Season 3 Episode 20: "The One with the Dollhouse"

Monica: When I was younger, all I wanted was to play with this dollhouse. But, no! It was to be looked at, but never played with.
Chandler: My grandmother used to say that exact same thing to me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: Come on Rach. When a guy says he's going to call, it doesn't mean he's going to call. This never happened to you?
Rachel: Well, they always called.
Monica: Hm, bite me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Uh, Pheebs, while we're hovering around the subject. I just have to say dinosaurs, they, they don't go "ruff!"
Phoebe: The little ones do.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chandler: I'm telling ya, Joanna's got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, "This was fun. Let's do it again sometime. I'll give you a call."
Rachel: Oh, gee. I wonder why she thinks you're going to call her?
Chandler: That's what you say at the end of a date.
Rachel: You can't just say, "Nice to meet you. Good night?"
Chandler: To her face?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 3 Episode 19: "The One with the Tiny T-Shirt"

Rachel: (After Mark kisses her) I'm sorry, Mark, I can't do this. I'm just doing this to get back at Ross. It's not fair to you.
Mark: Ah, fair, schmair! If you want to get back at Ross, I'm here for you!
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: How did the date go with Mr Millionaire?
Chandler: Mr Millionarire, new from Snooty Playthings! Third wife sold separately!
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: Oh you know what you should do? You should buy a state and then name it after yourself!
Pete: What, like Pete Dakota?
Phoebe: Or Mississi-Pete.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Chandler: Chicago isn't a state.
Joey: And Mississi-Pete is?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Chandler: Ross. You gotta stop. You can't just stare through the peep-hole for three hours. You're gonna get peep-eye.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Kate: That infomercial! For the milk carton spout thing! You're the guy who doesn't know how to pour milk!
Joey: I actually can pour milk. But I got you believing that I couldn't. See, that's acting.
Kate: Right at the end, you choked on a cookie.
Joey: Yeah, that was real.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: (Eavesdropping on Rachel and Mark) The door's closed! I can't see anything with the door closed!
Chandler: And the inventor of the door rests happily in his grave.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Monica: I gave you a key for emergencies.
Phoebe: We were out of Doritos.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realizes that life without me... sucks.
Chandler: It's possible. You are very lovable. I'd miss you if I broke up with you. Just trying to be supportive.
Ross: Then be supportive like a guy.
Chandler: (In a deeper voice) If I broke up with you, I'd miss you.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ross: (About Mark) I knew it. I knew it. I always knew she liked him. You know, she'd say no, but here we are, right? We just broke up, first thing she does!
Chandler: You didn't just break up.
Ross: Hey, it's been, like, three weeks!
Chandler: You slept with somebody three hours after you thought you broke up. I mean, bullets have left guns slower.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Kate: Hi.
Joey: Oh, so you're playing Adrienne, huh?
Kate: Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?
Joey: Oh, no. Ah, I'm playing your husband, Victor. I'm Joey Tribbiani.
Kate: Hi, nice to meet you. Kate Miller.
Joey: So the, ah, play's pretty great, huh?
Kate: Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murray's work. She's so brilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middle class.
Joey: Oh, forget about it. She rocks!
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: Wow! I cannot believe Mark asked you out.
Rachel: I know.
Phoebe: What, so what are you gonna tell him?
Rachel: Well, I told him I would think about it, but I'm gonna tell him no.
Phoebe: Huh.
Rachel: I mean I think I'd say no to anybody right now. Oh, but it was so strange. I mean I'm standing there with this charming, cute guy, who's asking me to go out with him, which I'm allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Ya know, like I'd be cheating on Ross or something.
Phoebe: Wow. So, okay, maybe that means that you're not over Ross yet and you have issues with your father.
Rachel: I don't have any issues with my father.
Phoebe: Okay, so it's probably just the Ross thing then.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ross: You, ah, wanted to see me?
Rachel: Yeah. Ah, here's a box of your stuff.
Ross: What?
Rachel: Oh, ya know, it's just like hats, and a shirt, and CDs, just sort of stuff that you've left here.
Ross: What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me or something?
Rachel: No. Ross, it, it just seems that ya know, it's time we, we ya know, move on.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: I can blow dry it. I can put gel on it. It doesn't matter, I still wind up with this little cowlicky thing on the middle part of my head. It's so annoying. Does it bug you?
Ross: You bug me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 18: "The One with the Hypnosis Tape"

Gunther: (Takes a drag off of Chandler's cigarette) Oh, Dark Mother ... once again I suckle at your smoky teat.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Voice on Tape: You are a strong, confident woman who does not need to smoke... (Tape cuts off)
Joey: (On tape) Joey is your best friend... You want to make him a cheese sandwich every day... You also want to buy him hundreds of dollars of pants...
 • Rating: Unrated

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