Futurama Season 2 Episode 8: "Xmas Story" Quotes
Farnsworth: You should be ashamed of yourself, Fry. You'd have to be blind not to notice that Leela's a cyclops.
Hermes: Fry's over there, man.
Fry: I feel like a rat. Here I am whining like a pig while all along Leela was lonely as a frog. I could kick myself.
Amy: I'll do it for you. (kicks Fry)
Fry: Ow! Thanks.
Fry: This dumb holiday just makes me think of all the things I left behind. Let's just stop talking about Xmas.
Hermes: Happy Xmas, Xmas people! Xmas cards have arrived! Xmas! Amy, there you go. Fry, Professor, Zoidberg, a mighty haul for Bender.
Bender: Yes! I got the most! I win Xmas!
Every Christmas my mom would get a fresh goose for goose burgers and my dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes.
Fry
Santa: I'll be back. Back when you least expect it: Next Xmas!
Bender: Ah! Nothing like a warm fire and a Super Soaker of fine cognac.
Fry: Yeah, it really puts you in the Christmas spirit.
Farnsworth: What-mas?
Fry: Christmas. You know? X-M-A-S.
Leela: Oh, you mean Xmas. You must be using an archaic pronunciation. Like when you say "ask" instead of "aks".
Zoidberg: You, a bobsledder? That I'd like to see!
Hermes: Listen, you filthy crab, a thousand years ago there was a legendary team of Jamaican bobsledders.
Fry: Yup, I remember. They came in last at the Olympics then retired to promote alcoholic beverages.
Hermes: A true inspiration for the children.
Man #1: Excuse me, sir, you're snowboarding off the trail.
Bender: Lick my frozen, metal ass.
Fry: They're supposed to be some kinda, you know, pine tree.
Farnsworth: Pine trees have been extinct for 800 years, Fry. Gone the way of the poodle and your primitive notions of modesty.
Fry: The important thing is we're all together for Xmas. And even though I'm surrounded by robots and monsters and old people, I've never felt more at home.
Farnsworth: Hear, hear! Now let's all of us shut up and sing!
Fry: Look, the food isn't what's important.
Tinny Tim: I'm so hungry.
Fry: Uh, Bender? Where did you get that bird?
Bender: I found it lying in the street, like all the food I cook.
