Would it be excessive of me to ask you to save my life twice in a week?

Tyrion

Joffrey: I'll tell you what. I'm going to give you a present. After I raise my armies, and kill your traitor brother, I'll give you his head as well.
Sansa: Or maybe he'll give me yours.

If you're going to be a cripple, it's better to be a rich cripple. Take care, Snow.

Tyrion

King Robert: Sometimes I don't know what holds it together.
Cersei: Our marriage.
King Robert: So, here we sit, 17 years later, holding it all together.
Don't you get tired?
Cersei: Every day.
King Robert: How long can hate hold a thing together?
Cersei: Well, 17 years is quite a long time.

Walder Frey: My granddaughter, Waltha? Walra? Waldina.
Mary: I'm Mary.
Walder Frey: Fine.

Cersei: Targareyans wed brothers and sisters for 300 years to keep the bloodline pure. Jaime and I are more than brother and sister. We shared a womb. We came into this world together, we belong together.
Ned: My son saw you with him.
Cersei: Do you love your children?
Ned: With all my heart.
Cersei: As do I.
Ned: And they're all Jaime's.
Cersei: Thank the Gods for that.

Tyrion: Do you think I'm plump? Listen, Benjen, may I call you Benjen?
Benjen: Call me what you like.
Tyrion: I'm not sure what I've done to offend you. I have great admiration for the Night's Watch, and for you as First Ranger.
Benjen: You know my brother once told me? That nothing someone says before the word but really counts.
Tyrion: But, I don't believe that giants and ghouls and white walkers are lurking beyond the wall. I believe that the only difference between us and the wildlings is that when that wall went up, our ancestors happened to live on the right side of it.

Cersei: I'm sorry your marriage to Ned Stark didn't work out. You seemed so good together.
King Robert: I'm glad I could do something to make you happy.

The gods love to reward a fool.

Brynden Tully

Everyone knew what this place was, and no one told me. No one but you. My father knew, and left me to rot at the Wall, all the same.

Jon

I never loved my brothers. Sad thing for a king to admit, but true. You were the brother I chose.

Robert

Ned: You're too fat for your armor.
King Robert: Fat? Fat is it? Is that how you speak to your King?