Sundays 10:00 PM on HBO
Game-of-thrones

Robert Arryn: Can I make the little man fly now?
Tyrion: Not this little man. This little man is going home now.

Where do I begin, my lords and ladies? I am a vile man, I confess it. My crimes and sins are beyond counting. I have lied and cheated, gambled and whored. I'm not particularly good at violence, but I'm good at convincing others to do violence for me. You want specifics, I suppose. When I was seven, I saw a servant girl bathing in the river. I stile her robe and she was forced to return to the castle naked and in tears. I closed my eyes, but I could still see her tits bouncing. When I was 10, I stuffed my uncle's boots with goat sh*t. When confronted with my crime, I blamed a squire. Poor boy was flogged, and I escaped justice. When I was 12 I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. I flogged the one-eyed snake, I skinned my sausage. I made the bald men cry into the turtle stew, which I believe my sister ate. At least I hope she did. I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel....

Tyrion

Have you ever heard the phrase "Rich as a Lannister?" Of course you have. You're a smart man. You know who the Lannister's are. I am a Lannister. Tyrion, son of Tywin. Of course, you have also heard the phrase, a Lannister always pays his debts. If you deliver a message from me to Lady Arryn, I will be in your debt. I will owe you gold. If you deliver the message, and I live, which I very much intend to do.

Tyrion

Listen to me. Sometimes possession is an abstract concept. When they captured me, they took my purse, but the gold is still mine.

Tyrion

I never loved my brothers. Sad thing for a king to admit, but true. You were the brother I chose.

Robert

He attacked one of my brothers and abducted the other. I should wear the armor, and you the gown.

Cersei

Jaime: I'm looking for my brother. You remember my brother, don't you Lord Stark? Blond hair, sharp of tongue, short man.
Ned: I remember him well.
Jaime: It seems he had some trouble on the road. You wouldn't know what happened to him, would you?
Ned: He was taken at my command, to answer for his crimes.

King Robert: Sometimes I don't know what holds it together.
Cersei: Our marriage.
King Robert: So, here we sit, 17 years later, holding it all together.
Don't you get tired?
Cersei: Every day.
King Robert: How long can hate hold a thing together?
Cersei: Well, 17 years is quite a long time.

Cersei: I'm sorry your marriage to Ned Stark didn't work out. You seemed so good together.
King Robert: I'm glad I could do something to make you happy.

Displaying quotes 37 - 45 of 112 in total