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Lorelai: What's the opposite of ennui?
Sookie: Off-ui. Hey, I'm cured!

Luke: I forgot my toolbox, so I just thought I'd come pick it up.
Lorelai: Oh, yeah. It's right over here. Rory and I couldn't lift it or we would've brought it to you, and then we got used to having it here, so we named it Bert, and we'd say, "Good night, Bert," and it'd say, "Good night girls," and--we spend too much time home alone.

(to Max about his proposal) It should be magical. There should be music playing and romantic lighting and a subtle buildup to the popping of the big question. There should be a thousand yellow daisies and candles and a horse and I don't know what the horse is doing there unless you're riding it, which seems a little over the top, but it should be more than this.

Lorelai

Max: We can't keep getting this close just to have something completely derail us again. And frankly there's only one thing I can think of that could solve it.
Lorelai: Break up.
Max: Ugh.
Lorelai: Well, I'm not interested in a murder-suicide kind of thing ...
Max: We should get married.
(long pause)
Lorelai: Give me a clue as to whether you're kidding or not.
Max: I am not kidding.
Lorelai: Good clue.

Max: I couldn't find a horse.
Lorelai: You didn't have to-
Max: Don't say anything, please. You were right last night, I shouldn't have proposed to you like that. It was stupid. It was the wrong place and the wrong time. I kicked myself the entire night for doing it. But you were wrong about something too. I didn't propose to you because we were fighting. I proposed because I love you. We're in a bad pattern Lorelai, and we have to break it. And other than that murder-suicide thing, which would be illegal and messy, I can only think to be impetuous.
Lorelai: Max.
Max: No listen, I woke up this morning and I realized that I studied and taught the great literature all my life. And those stories are replete with characters that let opportunities slip by, but what I teach is more than literature, it's lessons in life. If I don't follow these tenets, I'm not the man I thought I was, the man I want to be.

Max: So did you date Luke?
Lorelai: No, I did not date Luke.
Max: You can tell me.
Lorelai: I did not date Luke.
Max: There was a vibe.

(Luke has just left Lorelai's house, after having a rather intense encounter with Max)
Max: So are we going?
Lorelai: Uh, yeah. Just wanted to make sure you two were through swinging those things around. Someone's bound to lose an eye.
Max: What are you talking about?Lorelai: Nothing. I'll get my purse.
(Max follows Lorelai into the living room)
Max: So not to be blunt, but is that over?
Lorelai: Is what over?
Max: Whatever's going on that I just walked in on.
Lorelai: Oh Max, come on, that's Luke.
Max: I kind of picked something up there.
Lorelai: Okay. Well, drop it back on the ground and kick it under the couch, because there is no there there.
Max: Hey, it's okay. I mean, we were apart for quite a while. I never assumed you joined a convent.
Lorelai: Max.
Max: I mean, it's not like I didn't date while we were apart.
Lorelai: You dated?
Max: A little.
Lorelai: A little person?
Max: No, I dated a little.
Lorelai: Okay. Well, I didn't expect you to join a manvent or whatever the male equivalent of that is called. Who did you date?
Max: A monastery.
Lorelai: You dated a monastery?
Max: No, a monastery is the male equivalent of a convent.
Lorelai: Thank you Mr. Medina. I'll make a note for the quiz on Friday.
Max: I didn't know if I'd ever see you again.
Lorelai: No, I get it. Yes. We were apart. And, uh, you know, I didn't exactly remain inactive.
Max: So you did date Luke?
Lorelai: No, I did not date Luke.
Max: You can tell me.
Lorelai: I did not date Luke.
Max: There was a vibe.
Lorelai: There was no vibe. What is with the questioning? You won't tell me who you dated.

Rory: I can't date you, Tristan.
Tristan: Well I give you permission.
Rory: And on that humble not... (Rory walks off)

Luke: Yeah, I'm gonna get going. I just left my toolbox from when I was here earlier fixing things. I do a lot of little things around here for Lorelai.
Lorelai: Yeah, you're very handy. So Luke, we'll talk later.
Luke: Yes we will.
Max: Although probably not tonight. We won't be back until late.
Lorelai: No, I meant not tonight.
Max: Oh, I misunderstood.
Lorelai: I meant tomorrow. So tomorrow.
Luke: Absolutely. We see each other most everyday.
Max: Well sure, you've got the coffee.
Luke: And she needs the coffee. So I'll see you tomorrow.
Lorelai: Tomorrow.
Luke: Same time as always.
Max: I'd count on a little later.
Luke: Doesn't matter what time it is. I'll always be around.

(Rachel picks up her luggage and walks out from behind the counter after Luke returns from the town meeting.)
Luke: (With a look of recognition) So you're leaving huh?
Rachel: (Resignedly) Yeah.
Luke: Were you even gonna tell me?
Rachel: I was waiting for you to get back so I could say goodbye.
Luke: (Starting to get annoyed) Yeah, you at least always do that. So go.
Rachel: (With a pleading expression) Don't you even want to know why?
Luke: I know why.
Rachel: I don't think you do.
Luke: It's just like all the other times Rachel. You're the anywhere but here girl, you're restless, you're bored, it is what it is.
Rachel: That's not it.
Luke: Then what is it? Is there another guy?
Rachel: No.
Luke: Then what?
Rachel: It's another girl.
Luke: (Spluttering in confusion) What? You're telling me...
Rachel: The other girl isn't for me Luke, it's for you.
Luke: (In a disbelieving tone) Okay. Now that's crazy.
Rachel: Yeah?
Luke: Yeah.
Rachel: No.
Luke: You feel you need a different excuse this time to mix things up a little, fine. But you are not leaving because of me.
Rachel: I'm sure you tried Luke. But admit it, you're heart wasn't in it.
Luke: (Defensively) My heart was in it. I was here, I didn't leave. . . .(Confused) I don't get this.
Rachel: (Interjecting) Luke.
Luke: And what are you talking about, another girl? What other girl?
(Rachel stares at him meaningfully) Luke: (Finally realizing she means Lorelai) Oh Rachel, no, you don't mean. . . She and I are just friends. I told you that a thousand times.
Rachel: (Not letting him get away with denying it) No. You told it to me once. And you could barely get it out then.
Luke: (In a terribly unconvincing tone) Okay, this is crazy. You've got it wrong here. It's not. . .She and I are. . .uh. . .
Rachel: (Satisfied that she's finally adequately explained everything to Luke) I'm gonna go. I'll miss you. (she hugs him goodbye) Stay in touch.
Luke: (Pleading in a last ditch effort) Rachel, come on.
(Rachel walks to the door and stops. She turns around to look at Luke.)
Rachel: So don't wait too long okay?
Luke: To what?
Rachel: (Meaningfully) To tell her. (Rachel turns away and walks out of the diner leaving Luke staring into space alone.)

Madeline: So I've decided I'm now completely into Judy Garland. Did you see the TV movie? Pretty intense.
Louise: I think they used my mother's medicine cabinet in that.
Madeline: She was the Courtney Love of her day.
Paris: Show me a trend and I'll show you Madeline.
Madeline: Judy Garland is trendy?
Paris: Completely.
Louise: She was neo-addict retro chic.
Madeline: No one tells me these things

(At the town meeting)
Taylor: Lorelai, I hope that's not food in those bags. Food is not allowed at town meetings.
Lorelai: No Taylor, it is it's um, diapers for the little ones.
Taylor: What?
Lorelai: Dorsal fins and cucamonga.
Taylor: What did she say?
Lorelai: (Whispering to Max) I confuse him till he loses his train of thought and then he moves on. Hot dog?
...
(Later, when Lorelai has fries in her hand and Taylor looks at her suspiciously)
Lorelai: These are not fries. They are farfignugen sugen dugen.

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Gilmore Girls Season 1 Quotes

Rory: Yeah, they kept calling me Mary.
Lorelai: You're kidding me. Wow, I can't believe they still say that.
Rory: Why? What does it mean?
Lorelai: Mary, like Virgin Mary. It means they think you look like a goody-goody.
Rory: You're kidding.
Lorelai: No.
Rory: Well, what would they have called me if they thought I looked like a slut?
Lorelai: Well, they might have added a Magdalene to it.
Rory: Wow, biblical insults. This is an advanced school.

Lorelai: Wait, close your eyes and breathe. I smell snow.
Rory: Ah, it's that time of year.
Lorelai: Can't you smell it?
Rory: You know, it's like dogs and high-pitched noises. I think it's something only you can smell.
(Rory sits down next to Lorelai and pulls a blanket over the both of them)
Lorelai: I love snow.
Rory: Really, I had no idea.
Lorelai: Everything's magical when it snows, everything looks pretty. The clothes are great. Coats, scarves, gloves, hats.
Rory: Thermal underwear, wool socks, ear flaps.