Can't you see how screwed up I am about this? I've had two girlfriends and both have cheated on me.


You know what you are, Sue? You're a Grinch.


William, Elmo, you. Get the hell out of my office.

Sue [to Will, Emma and Beiste]

You're a regular Agatha Christie. Except even more sexless.


I'm everybody's Secret Santa. Yeah, you can just drop those anywhere.


You're not the only person at this school that consumes protein powder by the tubful.

Sue [to Beiste]

Just a friend. But on the upside, I'm in love with him and he's actually guy. So we'll call that progress.


Whether it's a heart attack or heartbreak, just like Broadway, the show must go on.


I'm very specific when I give a gift. You don't know how many kittens I gave away because they just weren't right.


When does Asian Santa arrive?


I want Channing Tatum to stop being in stuff.


I would like Puckerman to love me. He's a fox. I would also like sweet potato fries.


Glee Season 2 Quotes

Artie: We all know you can do it.
Brittany: I know that I can't. Just like I know the cricket that reads to me at night is totally stealing my jewelry.

Oh how I've missed your insanity.