Bart: ... A weekend curfew of 1 am.
Chuck: Is that Eastern or Pacific?

Oops! I forgot to put on underwear!

Serena

Blair: What took you so long?
Chuck: If you thought that was long, you have no idea what you're in for.

Chuck: My my, that girl has gotten under your skin.
Blair: The question is, Bass — will you?

Did you have a reason for coming to see me? Because if it was to insult me, there's a website you can go to.

You ever think your mom acts like she's perfect because she's too far from it to acknowledge that she's not?

Dan

Serena: Like when she married a raging cokehead that left blow everywhere?
Eric: It wasn't everywhere. Just on the smooth, shiny surfaces.

Who watches TV on a TV anymore?

Eric

Jenny: It's so weird that you're on a team now. Pretty soon you're going to have actual guy friends.
Dan: What are you talking about? I have plenty of guy friends.
Jenny: Dan, I know that you're Mr. Soccer now, but you and I both know you prefer to hang out with girls.

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