Rufus: I want the party moved more than anyone, but it's not worth resorting to blackmail.
Serena: Yeah. You're probably right. So. Psycho or Silence of the Lambs?
Rufus: Alright, make the call.

Blair: We are going to stage a private, intimate moment for Louis to stumble upon. And when he realizes he has nothing to worry about, he'll go back to Paris leaving Louis behind. For me.
Dan: No way.
Blair: I thought you were my friend.
Dan: I am. Which is why I'm going to point out to you what a bad idea this is. For starters, Serena's going to be at this party.
Blair: She's staying with Lily tonight.
Dan: Fine. Then everyone else in the world will be at this party. We'd have to tell Serena.
Blair: Absolutely not. You and I faking a kiss? Do you really want to have that conversation with Serena?
Dan: It can't be half as painful as this one.

Dan: Blair, I swear I had no idea. Some magazine editor called me out of the blue to hire me to write an article on your prince, and I swear I backed out the minute I knew he was with you.
Blair: Oh you should have been suspicious the minute someone wanted to pay you for your writing. That wasn't an editor, it was one of Louis' royal handlers. And your desperate need for literary validation cost me the greatest date of my life.

Blair: Meet me at Paul Smith's in half-an-hour. You know why and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Dan: How did you find out?
Blair: I always find out. Just be there.

Louis: The royal birthright has many strings attached. When my advisor discovered I was in New York, he hired one of your friends to follow me.
Blair: I will see to it personally that Penelope is deported to a desperate Third World country. Preferably someplace with Sharia law.
Louis: It was a man. He saw us at Veselka.
Blair: Dan Humphrey? He wouldn't do that.

Chuck: Where's Raina?
Nate: She went back to her hotel. I think your whole Howard Hughes routine is starting to freak her out a bit. It's actually starting to freak me out too, man. Talk to me.
Chuck: I saw what you two were looking at this morning. The tattered box, old photographs. Is Raina looking for her mother? It's a mistake. You have to stop her.
Nate: Look man, I know what happened with your mom was painful, but at least you got some answers. Reina deserves the same and she can handle it.

Eric: Hey! Where are they going with those scones?
Rufus: My guess is Blaine Trump's. I think your mother may have underestimated the impact of her sentence on her social standing.

Vanessa: So all my heartfelt attempts to save our friendship had no impact, but the aroma of cheese and dough turned you instantly sentimental?
Dan: They do say that sense of smell is most associated with memory.

Chuck: Is there a problem?
Nate: With Reina, no. But when you're ready to talk about whatever's up with you let me know.

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