I took control of my destiny. I changed my birthday. I am Queens Boulevard.

Jane

• Permalink: I took control of my destiny. I changed my birthday. I am Queens...
• Added: December 18, 2012

I didn't vote for Obama because I didn't respect his March Madness bracket!

Max

• Permalink: I didn't vote for Obama because I didn't respect his March Madne...
• Added: December 18, 2012

Are you back on the sweet and creamy?

Brad [to Max]

• Permalink: Are you back on the sweet and creamy?
• Added: December 18, 2012

What's gonna be open on Christmas? A gas station, drug store, Israel?

Penny

• Permalink: What's gonna be open on Christmas? A gas station, drug store, Is...
• Added: December 18, 2012

Happy birthday Jane...and Jesus.

Jane

• Permalink: Happy birthday Jane...and Jesus.
• Added: December 18, 2012

Max: You didn't like Ringling brother for brothers?
Brad: It would've been the greatest show on earf!

• Permalink: You didn't like Ringling brother for brothers? It would've bee...
• Added: December 18, 2012

Jane: A summer birthday really matches my easy breezy vibe.
Dave: Easy breezy vibe? I thought you had more of a dead of winter, girl with the dragon tattoo, Sarsgaard Murderhouse vibe.

• Permalink: A summer birthday really matches my easy breezy vibe. Easy bre...
• Added: December 18, 2012

I still can't believe you lied to me about your birthday. I thought you were older than me. I thought I was married to a MILF. Now all those fantasies about her about being my dad's new wife, giving me a bath and swaddling me, don't make sense.

Brad [to Jane]

• Permalink: I still can't believe you lied to me about your birthday. I thou...
• Added: December 18, 2012

Jane and Alex's parents are going to sex camp.

Brad

• Permalink: Jane and Alex's parents are going to sex camp.
• Added: December 18, 2012