Happy Endings

Happy Endings Quotes (Page 6)

Season 3 Episode 10: "Kickball 2: The Kickening"

Brad: Dave have your fingers lost weight?
 • Rating: Unrated

Dave: I didn't even know you could pronounce the name of your store. I thought it was a four letter keltic symbol for failure.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 9: "Ordinary Extrodinary Love"

Derrick: The only Orlando I like starts with Tony or ends with Bloom.
 • Rating: Unrated

Alex: Usually rebranding doesn't work. Look at KFC. I'm sorry guys but you will always been Kitchen Fresh Chicken to me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Max: Okay I know what you're doing. You're gay Yoda-ing me? Wait is that redundant?
 • Rating: Unrated

Max: That's right I'm straight now. From this moment forward, it's gonna be a steady diet of boobs and dudes, dammit. I am not longer interest in men, I am only interest in mankind. From this moment forward it will be a steady diet will be chicks with d...ammit. I love guys. My favorite thing to touch is va-penis.
 • Rating: Unrated

Alex: Honestly I haven't been too into music since Smashmouth left the game.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Penny: Oh my God, Oh my God I'm gonna die.
Alex: Me too! I mean we all are, but why are we talking about that now, it's sad.
 • Rating: Unrated

Max: Get paid to have sex and eat free food, Jane you beautiful broomstick I love it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Brad: My baby could sell snow to an Eskimo. And by snow I mean cocaine. Eskimos traditionally don't have a lot of disposable income so it's a pretty impressive sales feat.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 3 Episode 8: "Fowl Play/Date"

Max: I'd storm out right now if my love for funeral food wasn't greater than my hatred for two selfish jerks.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dave: When did we all turn against Mayer?
 • Rating: Unrated

Max: I plan on wining, dining and 79ing him. And yes if you're wondering that is 10 better!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Penny: What would Kerry Washington do in Scandal? Demand to see the President and then almost make out with him.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Penny: He said I broke the glass ceiling. That's right, I'll climb that corporate ladder in a skirt and I don't care who looks up it because I keep my yard tidy!
 • Rating: Unrated

Dave: Wow, that's what 275 pounds of lonely looks like.
 • Rating: Unrated

Max: It's a direct quote from my original screenplay "Heat 2: It's getting hot up in here."
 • Rating: Unrated

Jane: I don't know why I'm surprised, I once saw you put sunscreen on a grape because you didn't want it to become a raisin.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Alex: Hey guys! You all remember my super racist parrot Tyler.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 7: "No-Ho-Ho"

Jane: I took control of my destiny. I changed my birthday. I am Queens Boulevard.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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