Colin Hanks: There's 2 things I always say. 1: Yes, that Hanks. 2: Fame doesn't change you, it changes your friends.

Penny: Ever since she's been hanging out with Avi's crew all she eats is pills and powders.
Jane: Sounds like my Vegas diet.

Ooo floor bacon!

Max

Dave is Freddy Krueger-ing us in our dreams...with sex.

Jane

Drunk Jane loves a good cleaning.

Jane

Dave: Whore's bath?
Penny: Ah yeah David, I did take a whore's bath okay? I had a one night stand and didn't have time to shower so did I rub some dryer sheets on my pits and throw some water on my hush at Au Bon Pain? Yes I did.

I call it the boxer thong, business up front, party in the rear.

Dave

My body is a temple and your bodies are stadium urine troughs.

Penny

Wow we really are losing the war on drugs if animals are blowing rails.

Alex

Are you ready for the annual Brad and Jane spring smackdown?!?

Dave

That's the last time I administer an at home "bro-zilian." Speaking of, Dave we need more duct tape.

Max

I'm not the one who always goes out to the terrace to stretch because quote, the perv across the way needs to eat too!

Brad [to Jane]
Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 148 in total

Happy Endings Season 2 Quotes

You're sweating on my bruschetta.

Jane [to Brad]

The weird part is, now that I have a guy, everybody wants to set me up. Oh I know Al! I should hook you up with one of my "extras."

Penny
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