I'm gonna pretend to go to work now.

• Permalink: I'm gonna pretend to go to work now.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Is that a pill in your pocket, or are you just happy to have a tiny pill-shaped penis?

• Permalink: Is that a pill in your pocket, or are you just happy to have a t...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

My head's on your vagina.

• Permalink: My head's on your vagina.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Thirteen: We all want the same things: love, forgiveness, chocolate.

• Permalink: Love, forgiveness, chocolate.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Hi. I'm Dr. House. How long have you been a psychopath?

• Permalink: Hi. I'm Dr. House. How long have you been a psychopath?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

I'm sick of being miserable.

• Permalink: I'm sick of being miserable.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

House: Miserable stays miserable. Happy doesn't buy lottery tickets in the first place.
Thirteen: Our level of happiness is set. It's in our DNA. No cash payout's gonna change that.
House: It's like there's two of me.

• Permalink: Miserable stays miserable. Happy doesn't buy lottery tickets in...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

House: So I hope I didn't weird you out giving you that gift.
Dr. Cuddy: Can we talk about this later?
House: Of course. Is now later?

• Permalink: So I hope I didn't weird you out giving you that gift. Can we ...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dr. Cameron: What did Cuddy want?
House: I kinda hit that last night, so now she's all on my jock.
Thirteen: Wow, she looks pretty good for someone on roofies.

• Permalink: What did Cuddy want? I kinda hit that last night, so now she's...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

House: He's a self-important jerk,
Wilson: Seems to be what I'm attracted to.

• Permalink: He's a self-important jerk, Seems to be what I'm attracted to.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

And the bitch is back.

• Permalink: And the bitch is back.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

House: You're invoking the guy code?
Wilson: We're guys. It's a code.

• Permalink: You're invoking the guy code? We're guys. It's a code.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0