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Dr. Cuddy: Let's stay at my place tonight, okay?
House: Will you get cable?
Dr. Cuddy: No.
House: Then we'll have to have more sex.
Dr. Cuddy: Okay.

Dr. Cuddy: What are you doing?
House: I got bored with the porn on my computer. You got any girl on girl on girl on vibrating object on girl stuff?

Dr. Cuddy: But you used to have sex with her.
House: Well, it was a massage plus happy ending sort of thing. Now it's more of a sad ending. (brightly) Because of you!

Dr. Foreman: House was wrong trying to come up with a complicated reason you hired Kelly.
Dr. Chase: Thank you.
Dr. Foreman: It's actually quite simple. You think she's hot. You want to sleep with her.
Dr. Chase: Well, it was nice to see you finally taking an interest in my life. We should go bowling sometime.

Taub: Dude, is this about Thirteen?
Dr. Foreman: No. Why are you calling me "dude?"
Taub: Maybe its hard seeing House replace her when you've still got feelings?
Dr. Foreman: One - I don't have feelings for Thirteen beyond friendship. Two - it's a temporary replacement. And three - dude?
Taub: It felt right.

Dr. Wilson: They're identical. Do you even want my input?
House: No.
Dr. Wilson: Then why'd you invite me?
House: Who'd drive my car home if I buy a bike?

Dr. Wilson: How are things going with Cuddy?
House: Great. We've gotten to fifth base. That's two home runs, and then she gives me back a triple.

House: What's your position on legality of illegal break-ins?
Dr. Chase: That's more of a second-week type activity.

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