Season 5, Episode 22: "House Divided"
Amber: Aren't you curious why about why I'm here?House: Curious why no French maid's outfit. No spanky pants.
Amber: I'm a hallucination... not a fantasy.
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Season 5, Episode 21: "Saviors"
House: People only change after trauma, if they wanted to change before the trauma. Or if they've watched too many Afterschool Specials.• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
House: He loves a tree in Oregon more than he loves you. But he can't have sex with it. Unless it's that slutty oak outside Portland.
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House: (trying a differential) Balance organs, nerves, lungs, bones, heart.
Dr. Wilson: Things you use to make bratwurst.
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House: I lost my mojo.
Dr. Wilson: Have you retraced your steps? Does your cleaning lady check your pockets before...?
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House: Stuff you haven't eaten just proves you haven't eaten it.
Dr. Wilson: You were hoping for evidence of stuff I have eaten? First door on the right.
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House: Who eats kale? It's so bland, it doesn't even taste like kale.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Thirteen: I guess we'll just continue to twiddle our thumbs.
House: God, I hope that's an euphemism.
Dr. Cameron: How am I supposed to do a lumbar puncture on a patient with intractable hiccups?
House: I'm trying to figure out what that could be a euphemism for.
• Rating: 9.0 / 10 • Permalink
Dr. Foreman: The only kind of mothering House wants involves a bullwhip, leather diapers, and a credit card.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Dr. Cameron: I owe him a favor. He's taken about a dozen of my referrals over the last year.
Dr. Chase: I meant so that's five seconds to hand House the file, 30 for him to question your real motives, a minute for witty comments comparing the length of your legs to Thirteen's... plenty of time left over for the shore.
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Total Quotes: 287
