Favorite How I Met Your Mother Quotes
Ted: Listen I'm calling because last night I met this girl, and I was wondering if you had...
Claudia: Oh you have got to be freaking kidding me!
Stuart: Oh here we go...
Claudia: Twenty-four hours ago you were begging...begging me to bring some other girl to my wedding and now, what, you're over her?
Ted: I've moved on
Ted: Yes, on Saturday, after a little wine and a little dancing...
Barney: Alright, they better be making a new gender, because I'm revoking your dude license.
Ted: Yeah, how was that manicure yesterday?
Barney: Invigorating, thanks
[thinking while reading poetry] I sound kind of douchey. I can't stop myself!
Ted
Robin: Lily, I need a dress!
Lily: You're going? That's awesome! Oh, my God, four days to find a dress?
Robin: I know, it's a suicide mission!
Ted: They're dividing our group into smokers and non-smokers. That's not healthy.
Barney: You're right. [pause] Let's go have a smoke!
Ted: Okay, guys, I gotta say something, I think my feelings for Robin may be resurfacing.
Lily: Oh, please, they were buried in a shallow grave
Don't beat yourself up. He'll be fine. I mean, the guy's like a billionaire. He can put his platinum card on a fishing line and win ten chicks hotter than you
Barney
Ted [seeing Robin in her dress]: Still wow.
Robin: Wow yourself. Look who else brought it.
Ted: Oh, yeah. I thought about leaving it at home, but I figured, I don't want to get there and realize I need it and have to go all the way back to get it, so yeah, I brought it
I mean seriously, Claudia and Stuart? I mean I have hooked up with the odd lass who is beneath my level of attractiveness... but... you know I was drunk. There is no way Claudia has been drunk for three years
Barney
Marshall: So you admit it, the groom should have an equal say.
Lily: Oh, yeah, sure, on the stupid stuff, like who comes.
Marshall: So I can invite whoever I want.
Lily: Sure, there's plenty of room in the woods
Ted: Wow, thanks for being so cool about this cause you know Claudia said...
Stuart: Yeah, yeah, yeah. This morning at the rehearsal, Claudia called our 7-year-old flower girl a whore. So, don't take it personally, she's just a little stressed.
Barney: People often ask me "Barney how is that you're so psyched so much of the time"?
Lily: By who? Who asks you that? edit »
