Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS

Lily: I am going to have to walk this earth knowing that Barney has touched my boobs.
Robin: Yeah it stays with yah. His email reminders don't help.

Lily: Terms, if you can do all that stuff that Marshall just listed off I will let you touch one boob.
Barney: Both boobs!
Lily: Just one.
Barney: Touch and squeeze.
Lily: Just touch.
Barney: Touch and motor boat.
Lily: Just touch.
Barney: Honka honka?
Lily: Barney...
Barney: Just touch
Lily: Just touch.
Barney: For one hour.
Lily: For one second.
Barney: Twenty minutes both boobs.
Lily: Thirty seconds one boob.
Barney: Four minutes, both boobs, three squeezes.
Lily: One minute, both boobs, one squeeze.
Barney: Deal!

Show us the onion volcano, the fried rice beating heart, the shrimp in the pocket.


Hashtag burn, hashtag your tie is still dumb, hash tag refill!


Let the dinnertainment begin!


Ted: Jeez Lily it's like you have a butt on your chest.
Barney: Whoop whoop whoop whoop!

Robin: Lily what on Earth is going on with your cans?
Lily: Oh these old thangs? I got my pregnancy boobs!

Duck duck gross!

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