How I Met Your Mother Quotes
Barney: I've had sex in Ted's bed 14 times.
Ted: I asked if you wear shoulder pads.
Ted: Uh Barney who's taller, me or you?
Barney: You're taller, I wear lifts in all my shoes.
Screw tomorrow, lets go big tonight.
Marshall
Look at this thing! I'll never have cold pizza again! I'll never have cold pizza again...
Marshall
Suit like that only needs one button, self destruct.
Barney
Chicago? Is that even a real place?
Barney
I don't need objectivity. You're my best friend, I just need your support.
Lily
I love Barney, but I'm not going to jail for him.
Ted
Robin: I'm sorry I don't have time for your drama right now, my fiancé is missing.
Lily: Marshall got picked to be a judge. He took the job without even asking me. Italy's off.
Robin: I have time for your drama.
The no more surprises thing is the best part of being married.
Lily
Robin: Take a good look at this face Barney OK? Cause it will be useful for the future. This is my pretty mad face.
Barney: Well then we've got a problem, cause it looks a lot like your pretty hungry face.
Robin: I'm missing the bacon wrapped figs!
So many great things about this girl. Her boobs, her rack, her chest.
Barney
