Mac: You have a bad shoulder, and that's why you could never have a catch with me, right?
Mac's Dad: Riiiiiight.

Mac: Thanks for coming with me, man.
Charlie: Well, you're forcing me too, so, yeah.

I'm gonna save my dad's life!

Mac

What’s up bitches! I’m a man cheetah! Wanna do something with this?

Frank

Shit that's Def, that's super Def.

Charlie

Now you? I don’t know who the hell you are, ‘cause we didn’t have a black.

Frank

It’s good, it’s all good. I’m talking to myself, but it’s all good.

Dennis

Instead of eating it last — you don’t have to eat beak at all!

Dee

We've literally and figuratively missed the boat.

Dennis

Dennis: All of us have gotten god damn weird.
Frank: I think we're just hitting our stride!

It’s got land to sea craftsmanship! We’re not missing that boat —

Dennis

Only two words came up! Asians and creampies.

Frank

It's Always Sunny Quotes

Charlie: I'll totally pull a Good Will Hunting on those kids and that'll put them in their place.
Mac: How you gonna do that?
Charlie: Well, you've seen the movie right?
Mac: Yeah.
Charlie: So all I gotta do is, I'll ask them some big shot, like math or science, history-type college question aand that will totally stump them by knowing a lot more about the answer than they do.
Mac: In that movie, Matt Damon played a genius janitor, you're just a janitor.
Charlie: Right, you stumped me with that one.

Mac: He doesn't have any poison.
Charlie: I don't have any on me, but I do keep some in my fridge at home in the relish jar.
Frank: There's poison in that jar? I thought I was allergic to pickles. What's in the jar with the skull and crossbones?
Charlie: Well that's mayonnaise. It's a decoy.
Frank: And the mayo?
Charlie: That's shampoo.
Frank: You're telling I've been putting shampoo on my sandwiches?
Charlie: If you've been using the mayonnaise, then yeah, probably.