Thursdays 10:00 PM on FX
Its-always-sunny-in-philadelphia

This is for the rats!

Charlie

If animals have taught me anything, it's that you can easily die and very quickly under a bus and on the side of the road.

Charlie

Dennis: Do you have any money?
Charlie: Yeah, it's all right there. I put it all on black.

Dennis: We were hoping to be dropped off at a casino, this is just a motel.
Byron: I know. I thought we'd slip into a room and you could check my oil.

Animals can see souls. That is a fact of nature.

Mac

I named him Peter Peter Nickel Eater, because last night in the car he tried to eat a nickel.

Dee

I will not suck you and I will not be sucked on by you.

Byron

What do you say we slip into a room....and you two split me open like a coconut?

Byron

Charlie: Are you wearing makeup?
Dennis: I'm always wearing a little bit of foundation but that's not the point.

Displaying quotes 19 - 27 of 110 in total