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Sam getting into a fight, that's some scary s#$t, and I just don't know what to do right now.

Ronnie

So we go downstairs it's like mad dark, but like ten seconds into the club where the crowd was, bang, I see like these two girls like rolling around on the ground and I'm like oh s#$t, chick fight, then I look over and I'm like holy s#$t it's Sam!

Pauly D

The bunny costume is f#$king awesome, just because it looks like a serial killer.

Snooki

I don't even remember this stripper's name. Could've been Indeeda, because I need a cigarette, I need some French toast, you know what, I need you to get the hell out of here.

Situation

Yeaaa Buddy! Birthday sex, everybody should get laid on their birthday.

Pauly D

I have no idea why this stripper is worrying about socks.

Situation

And I told this chick, I would like to get in my birthday suit with you, and she's down.

Pauly D

I'm having fun with this blonde stripper right now, um so much fun I might even take her home.

Situation

I got cakes, I got strippers, I got my friends, this is the best day of my life.

Pauly D

It went from a nightmare to a dream because actually the chicks were cute.

Situation

This is the best cake I've had in my life.

Pauly D

It's pretty hard to surprise me, you know I'm pretty paranoid.

Situation
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 912 in total

Jersey Shore Quotes

Pauly D: Yo, if she still has coloring books ... she's too young for you, man.
Vinny: If she's got a basket on her bicycle ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If she still has the parental controls on her TV ... she's too young for you bro.
Vinny: If she only owns Snow White on DVD ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If his Keds still light up ... he's too young for you bro.
Ronnie: [laughs]
Pauly D: If she still plays laser tag ... she's too young for you bro.
JWoww: That's me.

I'm the sweetest bitch you'll ever meet, but do not f*ck with me.

Sammi