You better send roses to the house, you feel me?! ROSES, DAWG, WITH PICKLES IN UM!! FRIED PICKLES!! for my sister.

Pauly D

I hate the ocean, it's all whale sperm. Everybody Google it, because that's why the water is salty, from the f**kin' whale sperm.

Snooki

Jeff is ready to do moves on me... but really I had my friggin' period. Story of my life.

Snooki

I told [Pauly D] I'm taking his sperm and making babies out of it.

Snooki

It's not Halloween. I'm not handing out candy for free, like you need a golden ticket to get in these drawers.

Deena

I remember I [masturbated] all day once and the next day I couldn't even move.

Snooki

Why is Ronnie bleeding out of his ass? I have no idea.

Sammi

Everyone's having a good time, everyone's gettin' along in the house. But, once again, one step forward, two step backs.

Ronnie

I need her to shut the other one up so I can get it in.

JWoww

I didn't know she'd flip the script. I thought she'd leave ... Sammi will just bring you down and down because she thinks at the end of the day you deserve it.

JWoww

Gina: You might be able to cuddle, that's about it.
Vinny: I love cuddling. That's my favorite!

Sammi: Don't you touch anybody.
Ronnie: I didn't touch anybody like that.
Sammi: I saw it, you f*%king idiot.
Ronnie: On who?
Sammi: You.
Ronnie: On who did I touch like that?
Sammi: You tell me, bro. You f*%king did it.

Jersey Shore Season 3 Quotes

Like a monkey has to go to the f*%kin' jungle, I belong at the Jersey Shore.

Vinny

I'm so excited to get back into my house, pop some bottles and hook up with my roommates.

Snooki