Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

I'm just a boy trying to bring style back to travel.

Manny

Don't be disrespectful Luke, anybody could do it with Gloria.

Phil

You're all the porn I need.

Phil

If this so-called Santa Claus doesn't bring me a burgundy dinner jacket, I'm going to have a big problem.

Manny

I got scared because the cabinet didn't fall down.

Luke

Take it down a notch. We're just trying to make a friend not initiate a three-way.

Mitchell

Cameron: I remember once at a New Year's Eve party, stroke of midnight, he high-fived me. Two problems with that: One, gays don't high five. Two, gays don't high five.

I brought you some soda, but I couldn't find any straws, so you'll have to drink it like cats.

Luke

Sweetheart I would love to be wrong, but I don't live with the right people for that.

Claire

There's no reason you should stay upright, but it just works.

Jay [to Gloria]

You can insult a lot of things about me - my hair, my voice, my balance-board exercises - but don't insult my selling. That crosses a line. What line? Oh, you don't see it? That's because I just sold it!

Phil

This whole thing is a colossal fog cue.

Jay
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 1229 in total

Modern Family Quotes

Comfort is not everything. My toes have been numb since my Quinceanera.

Gloria

You can’t do this. We’re a danger to ourselves. We’re a family of fire starters, poison eaters, and online prostitutes.

Phil
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