I'm just a boy trying to bring style back to travel.

Manny

We'll be on her like white on rice... which might sound racist because we're white and she, presumably, like rice.

Cam

You're all the porn I need.

Phil

Cameron: I remember once at a New Year's Eve party, stroke of midnight, he high-fived me. Two problems with that: One, gays don't high five. Two, gays don't high five.

I got scared because the cabinet didn't fall down.

Luke

Take it down a notch. We're just trying to make a friend not initiate a three-way.

Mitchell

If this so-called Santa Claus doesn't bring me a burgundy dinner jacket, I'm going to have a big problem.

Manny

You're going to find somebody because you're an amazing girl Katie, you're the whole package, I just prefer someone who has one.

Cameron

Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America.

Mitchell

Are you doing sex?

Luke

Perhaps I'll be Reginald Appleby. An English gentleman in town for a polo match.

Phil

My gaydar is never wrong and it is pinging like we're at a bathhouse.

Mitchell

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

You're like a mob wife. You complain about what I do, but have no problem wearing the fur that fell off the back of the truck.

Mitchell