By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

Claire: My mom started drinking these cocktails called "horny Colombians" with some of Gloria's uncles, whom apparently the drink was named after
Phil: Oh come, they were funny
Claire: They kept grabbing my butt
Phil: Somebody is full of herself. It's a Colombian wedding tradition.. they said

You dated a Dottie after Dede?

Gloria

Good to see you Betty Luke.

Phil [to Luke]

Calm down, you're gonna spook the boob.

Luke [to Manny]

I'm not adorable, I'm getting a mustache.

Luke

Uh, uh, nobody throws up until I sing.

Phil

You are living in a little girl's toy and you have to move out!

Cam [to Barry]

Saying nothing is not lying. It's just letting the truth speak for itself.

Haley

When did you two become such old women?

Claire [to Mitchell and Cam]

I'm just 90% sure he's 100% gay.

Claire

Phil: Remember the great Kevin Bacon on footloose?
Luke: More like Foot-loser.

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

Claire: My mom started drinking these cocktails called "horny Colombians" with some of Gloria's uncles, whom apparently the drink was named after
Phil: Oh come, they were funny
Claire: They kept grabbing my butt
Phil: Somebody is full of herself. It's a Colombian wedding tradition.. they said