Said it since day one. The only thing coordinated about this kid is his outfits.

Jay [about Manny]

With great hotness comes great responsibility.

Haley

Claire: Haley I need the wifi corner get down.
Haley: Ugh! I need Instagram to know there's still beauty in the world!

Gloria: Manny's first girlfriend is a senior with a Mustang.
Jay: I'd have put my money on a sophomore with a mustache.

Well that's attractive. You look like a puppy with a slipper.

Mitchell [to Cam]

It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it.

Luke

I wanna hear your point but right now this magic juice is gonna help mama turn that bathtub into a swim up bar.

Claire

How surprised should we be? I mean he's basically a hyperactive toddler who just wants to play all the time.

Alex

Not since I fell off the roof while they were delivering our trampoline have things come together so beautifully.

Phil

Oh relax, I'm sure you guys will find a couple that wants to get with you.

Haley

That's right, my boy's datin' her. He's datin' her real good.

Jay

Earl: I banged your ex wife!
Jay: If you banged Dede, I DO owe you an apology!

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley