We're like magnets, that sometimes take a break to date other magnets.

Dylan

All I wanted was to bribe my way into that school by making cubbies that stuff didn't fall out of.

Jay

As an actual glasses wearer, I find it offensive.

Alex

What is with you Americans and the foot?

Gloria

We call ourselves the artful lodgers.

Cam

It's like being on a submarine, right?

Phil

Lily: Where's the little leprechaun?
Cam: I think he's still getting dressed.

You're not working for the rolo-dex stealing Earl Chambers!

Jay

Mitchell: That was a take-out menu.
Earl: I don't want that man to know where I eat.

Okay, woah, this is exactly how it started out when I found out my father wasn't really in space.

Dylan

Phil: It's time, somebody warm some towels!
Claire: Every time I crack an egg, really?

We have been renting the upstairs unit to some frat boys from Cam's old college. They're here for some big game and to try to get on the Price is Right. Unfortunately for me it's brought out Cam's bromosexual side.

Mitchell

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley