Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

I think I found a place where I can sell this organ. Can you drive me to the black market?

Luke

It's just a cold silly, you don't have to conceive of a world without me!

Haley [to Dylan]

With all you do for me, including going to the gym four times a week to keep me interested, I got this.

Phil

Luke: Is that your cheerleading baton?
Phil: Not when you're on the business end of it!

Manny: Where did I hear that siren?
Jay: That was your mother screaming.
Gloria: I wasn't that bad.
Jay: Cars were pulling over.

That gay cruise ship has sailed.

Cam [on Lily having a normal childhood]

You're worried about germs? I've seen you kiss a pigeon on the mouth.

Phil [to Luke]

You did one production of Godspell in a barn. You're barn folk!

Mitchell [to Cam]

How was it a big day for Biscuit? How?

Cam
Displaying quotes 1 - 9 of 14 in total