Jay: So you don't think I look like Ben Franklin?
Gloria: Oh yes! That's who it is! The man from the hundred dollar bill. My favorite!

• Permalink: Oh yes! That's who it is! The man from the hundred dollar bill. My favorite!
• Added: October 29, 2014

It's obvious mom, you use Halloween as a way to show people you have edge. It's like accountants who buy are Harley.

Alex

• Permalink: It's obvious mom, you use Halloween as a way to show people you have edge. It's like...
• Added: October 29, 2014

Sexy people go crazy too you know. Read a people magazine.

Haley

• Permalink: Sexy people go crazy too you know. Read a people magazine.
• Added: October 29, 2014

C'mon Jay this is my farewell tour Trick-or-Treating in the neighborhood, I have to go out strong.

Manny

• Permalink: C'mon Jay this is my farewell tour Trick-or-Treating in the neighborhood, I have to go out...
• Added: October 29, 2014

Claire: Welcome to the insane asylum of from hell!
Phil: That's what it feels like.

• Permalink: That's what it feels like.
• Added: October 29, 2014

People say clothes make the man but that makes no sense. What makes the man is a nice head of hair. Dammit it's like a phantom limb.

Jay

• Permalink: People say clothes make the man but that makes no sense. What makes the man is a nice head of...
• Added: October 29, 2014

Claire: You gonna put some blood on that? Maybe dangle an eyeball?
Phil: Who hurt you? I'm kidding, I know it's Jay and Dede.

• Permalink: Who hurt you? I'm kidding, I know it's Jay and Dede.
• Added: October 29, 2014

You do this every time. You go as a princess, I have to go as some freak. You're a beauty, I'm the beast. You're Beyonce, I'm...that guy.

Jay [to Gloria]

• Permalink: You do this every time. You go as a princess, I have to go as some freak. You're a beauty,...
• Added: October 29, 2014

Cam: It's a bird! It's a plane!
Mitchell: It's super out of breath.
Cam: Happy Halloween to you too.

• Permalink: Happy Halloween to you too.
• Added: October 29, 2014