Modern Family "Not In My House" Quotes
Phil: You're all the porn I need.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jay [on Barkley]: He lost his monocle on the drive. Head was out the window.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jay: You're just mad at the old balls and chain.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jay: I could be a chump, do the usual, give the money back to the casino. Or I could do something for myself and get something from the casino store.
• Rating: Unrated
Jay: We're both with people different from us, and that's gonna create stuff. But you want different.
• Rating: Unrated
Luke [on diaries, not boobs]: Some are real, right? Like Anne Frank's?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Mitchell [on the gardener]: He's like Batman, but straight.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Cameron: I'm like a big runaway charity truck and Mitchell is my off-ramp full of safety gravel.
• Rating: Unrated
Gloria: This is not art. This is an unholy mix between man and beast.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Phil: That was hardly porn. It was a topless woman on a tractor. You know what they call that in Europe? A cereal commercial.
• Rating: 4.4 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 10