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That’s the worst call since they cast Russell Crowe in Les Miz!!


Mitchell [to Lily]: Wanna get our face painted like a pretty butterfly?
Cam: No I’m not in the mood.

Their ship went down but their love lasted forever!


Did you see that? When has your dad ever not wanted to pull Luke's finger. He's hurting.


Claire, I owe you a pack of lady razors.


We're in my kitchen, you have to stop saying 'hooker!'


He's a weird man. He's like Phil except I have to pay for him.


Andy: I'm the new Manny.
Manny: Am I being replaced?

A thousand therapists couldn't do what Gloria did for me.


Pepper: My job is to give you a snowflake that makes everyone die with jealousy.
Cam: That's all we've ever wanted.

I don't like another woman in my house. I want to be the star.


Well do you like this suit? I wouldn't know because all you said was that it was tight and not in a cool, black way.

Displaying quotes 145 - 156 of 1213 in total

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Modern Family Quotes

Phil: My wife is always so tired and she's always making lists of things for me to do.
Claire: Maybe if you did them she wouldn't be so tired.
Phil: Oh no, she could make lists for days.

I'm sort of like Costco. I'm big, I'm not fancy and I dare you to not like me.

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