Modern Family

Modern Family Quotes (Page 3)

Episode 10: "Express Christmas"

Gloria: Luke!
Luke: At what?
Gloria: What do you mean at what? I said Luke.
Luke: I am looking!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Haley: Uh I have a party tonight. You promised I could go if I got a B on my test. I studied, I read stuff, what was the point of all that?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil: Ho Ho Hold up a sec!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Jay [to Claire and Mitchell]: You two needed time with your mom, I've already served time with your mom.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Episode 9: "Punkin Chunkin"

Kenneth: What would Phil Dunphy do?
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0

Phil [about Kenneth]: He's me and it's spectacular!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Claire [to Haley]: Do you know what's illegal in Europe? Nothing! You're going to college!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Cam: All this from someone who never chunked a Punkin!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Haley: Saying nothing is not lying. It's just letting the truth speak for itself.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Jay: If you told him the truth he'd thank you later.
Gloria: Like Claire and Mitch, did they thank you?
Jay: Not yet, but it's coming.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Phil: Quick, what's my favorite hospital food? Jellooo.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil: If I had a son I'd want him to be like Kenneth.
Claire: You do have a son.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil: Why hug when you can manshake?
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Episode 8: "After the Fire"

Phil: I have three kids and at least one of them is going to college. Worst case scenario, they all go!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil: I know you were reluctant to get that massage, but I think we can both agree it had a happy ending.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Alex [to Haley]: You have your fans, I have mine. And one day, your fans are gonna work for my fans.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Claire: Mitchell is turning Gloria into mom.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Haley [about Alex]: Uncle Cam, as her future prom date can you please talk to her? You know fashion and stuff.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Haley [to Alex]: Let me burn your clothes!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Luke: You gotta grab what you can, when you can.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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