Modern Family

Modern Family Season 2 Quotes (Page 3)

Season 2 Episode 21: "Mother's Day"

Mitchell: It happens to be mother's day. Not martyr's day.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Luke: I say we eat what we kill.
Manny: Then I guess we'll be eating the mood.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 20: "Someone to Watch Over Lily"

Gloria: Lily! When something awful happens, you're going to be mine!
Mitchell: It really is an "if" situation...
Gloria: All mine!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Gloria: I said I was sorry! But I've had them since I was two. Huge ones!
Phil: What is she...?
Claire: Earrings, Phil. Earrings.
 • Rating: 3.7 / 5.0

Phil: You know why else he's gonna be ok? Because somewhere out there is a little girl who's making lists and labeling bins...and he's gonna find her.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Claire: Please don't let me screw up our son!
 • Rating: Unrated

Cameron: You punctured our daughter!
Gloria: But did you see both sides? I didn't just do the gay ear, look!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mitchell: How are you doing?
Cameron: Oh not good. I'm just glad my clown training prepared me to take a fall like that.
Mitchell: In terms of talking about it, are we looking at weeks? Months?
Cameron: Do not minimize it, oh he who I had to rush to the emergency room when he fell out of his clogs.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Cameron: Wait! There's the esteem-building parent right there. Wait! I think I hear future Lily sending us a message from her stripper pole. Thanks gay-dad dads; this dance is for you!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Psychologist: Mrs. Dunphy, what exactly are you worried about?
Phil: Get comfortable.
 • Rating: Unrated

Luke: She's like the best doctor every. A couple of puzzles. No shots. I didn't even have to take my pants off. I found that one out a little late.
Phil: I've been there buddy.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil: You're just a worrier, like when you thought he was never gonna talk.
Claire: He was two, and all he could do was bark.
Phil: I understood him.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Manny: If I'm sick, I might get the chaperone sick. And without the chaperone, it's anarchy! The buddy system falls apart; the principal of last-in, first-out is ignored.
Jay: It's butterflies.
Manny: Where?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Cameron: I love Jay, but I don't know about him raising a child.
Mitchell: He raised me.
Cameron: Well now you've put me in an awkward position.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Luke: Smell Heather for me.
Phil: I always do...not.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Haley: No way, she plays Lacrosse and plays the cello. Even my reputation can't take that dork hit.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Luke: One time, she gave me a Woody.
Claire: Sweet J...
Luke: She remembered he's my favorite character from Toy Story.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Mitchell: Did we come at a bad time?
Claire: Come back in five years and seven months when they're all gone!
 • Rating: Unrated

Claire: Phil, the frying pan is on fire!
Phil: Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jay: Want some coffee?
Manny: Say yes. It's french press. I was doubtful too, but I honestly can't see myself going back to drip.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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