I don't want my mom there. I'm exploring some darker themes I'm not sure she's read for. Poems like the umbilical noose, a jail called mom, Smother nature. She'll just find a way to make it all about her.

Manny

Haley: Oh yeah she can wear whatever she wants after I've had it for six months.
Alex: Or I get it automatically if you buy anything that looks like it.

Maybe I bring out the worst in them when there's no fun loving Phil around to neutralize my toxins.

Claire

I know that tone. You're making a point.

Phil [to Claire]

Gloria: He's a lying, scheming little sneak. That's my son.
Jay: Our son.

The way he looked at me, it was like I wore a tube top in church.

Claire

Mitchell look around, your family is cheating on me with your ex boyfriend!

Cam

You know, I've got problems of my own. I can't always be the lovable sidekick on the manny show. Did you even notice I'm binge eating?

Luke

I can't lie to that face. It's a good thing we're not married.

Gloria

What did I say about these flowered blankets for him? He's starting to take after Hugh Hefner over there.

Jay

Phil: How low can you go?
Haley: I'm at a roller rink with my family on a Saturday night. I win!

You've just gotta tell him man to man, woman to man, you're very shapely.

Phil

Modern Family Season 4 Quotes

We all weave a web of lies. Some we tell to try to help the ones we love, some we tell to try to fool ourselves.

Manny

So what you're saying is you have a child shaped hole in your heart and you wanna stuff a cat into it.

Mitchell [to Cam]