Gibbs: So listen. Stretch. This isn't a game. You've got one shot at your friend. No fooling around.
Tall Tony: Don't worry. I'm an actor.
Gibbs: Yeah. That's what I'm worried about.

Tony: What's the matter?
McGee: I'm getting a call from myself.
Bishop: Answer it. See what you want.

Susan: Dad I've been looking all over for you.
Tony: Oh. Do I have a sister I don't know about?
Senior: Don't joke, Junior. There's obviously something wrong with her. You've mistaken me for someone else.
Susan: There's so much I have to tell you.
Tony: Here you go. Here's a little something. Get yourself something to eat.
Susan: Dad. Please don't leave me.

Gibbs: You said you were looking for a project. Go find her.
Senior: You serious?
Gibbs: You got something better to do?

I'm expecting a call from a jeweler. I've been looking at diamond rings.

McGee

Tony: My father brought a straight off the street bag lady into my apartment, rusty old shopping cart and all. And dad said that it was your idea, Gibbs?
Gibbs: I'm glad he found her.

Senior: They took her fingerprints and I'm hoping that Abby can find a match.
Tony: Dad that's very commendable but you can't ask Abby to break agency rules for a personal favor.
Abby: We got a hit.
Tony: You ran the prints?
Abby: Of course, I did, Tony. Poor homeless woman in need of medical care? That's a no-brainer.

Tony: Your suggestion that he help the homeless woman....he's really invigorated, you know. He has a purpose, acting like his twenty years younger. Thank you.
Gibbs: Just gave the chief a nudge.

Vance: Well, at this point we can't charge either one of them. Whoever we brought to trial...her defense would be that the other one did it.
Gibbs: I agree with you. There's so much reasonable doubt, a jury could never convict.

So, are these two women (who supposed hate one another) conspiring to cover up the truth?

Ducky

You want to know what I got? I got this room. This sad, little borrowed room. It's mine. So, I'm telling you to get out.

Davis

Davis: How long were planning on sitting out there?
Gibbs: Probably sleep better out there than I did last night.
Davis: Why, insomnia?
Gibbs: No. Couch is old and the spring popped through. Kept me up.
Davis: What you doing on the couch? Wife got you in the doghouse?
Gibbs: No, it's nothing like that. The bedroom was ours, you know? And, well she passed away.
Davis: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

NCIS Quotes

Abby: McGee, I want to celebrate that you can light up a room as fast as you can ping a phone.
McGee: Well thanks!
Abby: Hashtag: living rocks.
Gibbs: Hashtag get to the point.
Abby: Oh my God, Gibbs. You just used the word hashtag in a sentence

Hugo: Who's asking?
Vance: NCIS
Fornell: FBI
Hugo: WC 10-gauge. Now get the hell off my property.